Aborted Women: In Their Own Words

Catholic But Not Dogmatic

by Viola W
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My story is a story about my family: I am a married woman in my forties. We are Catholic but not dogmatic. I have been married for fifteen wonderful years to a man I care about deeply. I have given birth to five wonderful boys, four of whom have lived (the first died of unknown causes).

Earlier this year I found out I was pregnant again. I had to think this one over since my husband is the sole breadwinner (homemaking is a full time job, I haven't been to work as a maid in years). Ultimately I had to decide to have an abortion because my husband would not be able to feed another child and because I would like to see some (or preferably) all of my boys go to college. As it is we are just getting by. And beyond that having birthed so many babies my health is not as good as it used to be. I don't know if I could take carrying and birthing another baby. Especially since I'm very busy with the four I already have.

And just for the record, since I don't think birthing any more babies would be a good idea for my family or for me I have since decided to start on birth control (the IUD since it's very low-hormone and highly effective). I know that dogmatic Catholicism does not like birth control but i have had enough babies, and I don't think that kicking my husband (whom I love dearly) out of bed would be good for my marriage.

So there you have it. That's my story. I'm normally a very private person but I thought it important to share my story because I didn't really have anyone to help me with my decision and women need that kind of support. There are those who would try to make us women feel guilty about the choices we've made. But my choices are for my family and I don't expect anyone who hasn't been in my shoes to truly understand my situation.

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Posted Nov 11, 2008

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